who knows...

(This is from Wednesday during my break betwixt classes)


Even the professor's seem to have cliques. What the hell... Why does it matter? Why does it bother me so much? Why do I have to be so damn insecure about things sometimes? Why can't I just be a "normal" college student? What IS a normal college student? Why do I do the things I do sometimes? Why do I make the decisions I do? There are so many questions, so many unknowns that are just thrown up in the air. When will I get some answers!?!?!?!

There's a guy sitting in the chair across from me, he is totally oblivious to the fact that I'm torn inside. Not that he matters. I've never understood why I have this drive to be like everybody else. I have trouble being my own person, I'm far too self-conscious. I could never go out wearing sandals and tall socks with shorts for instance.

I don't know how people that actually face problems deal with it. Put almost anybody in my position, other than maybe the grades, and they would think it's a great life. I just don't know... (Typing it doesn't count as saying it! ;)

"Hold me closer Tiny Dancer
Count the headlights on the highway
Lay me down in sheets of linen
You had a busy day today..."


That song always makes me feel better, I think of happy things, like jumping off a roof into a pool while on acid.

Well, andywho, who knows where this post came from, I just started writing, maybe someday I'll come back with some answers. Until then...

Have a nice summer!

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

EC in the summertime..

RIP Mitch